The Old Gods is the eighteenth story in Jellyfist. This story begins with a kid bird-watching as a man approaches and says, "Everything you know is soon to be so much dust in the presence of the old ones". The kid seems to be taking it as a joke, so when he asks if these old gods were in some sort of parallel dimension, he is astonished when the man says (and proves), "NO... THEY'RE IN MY PANTS". The astonished kid barely knows what to say when the sudden change of mood comes from the man, when he talks about a nearby bird and leaves happily.